Now that you've graduated what's next? You ran the race and you kept the fight. You finished your assignment, so what's next? I have to be very transparent about my feelings from that day up until now. Even though I put in the work, I had never felt so unaccomplished. I found myself asking God what's next? I found myself also telling him now that I have accomplished this why do I feel so unaccomplished? What is missing in my life? I've prayed in season and out, I have studied, read your word. Did I do this in vain? Did I do it just to be doing it? Lord i know that I know your voice. Why do I feel the way that I do? And God took me back to the day of the graduation. Instead of celebrating myself I wanted others to celebrate me. Can you imagine someone throwing you a party and over a hundred invites being sent out, only to have maybe 25 people to show up and celebrate with you? I cried like a baby. My words were Lord I show up for everyone and you mean to tell me that they couldn't show up for me on this day to celebrate with me? No explanation from some. Some called and gave explanations and I understood that. Then from that day to now some still have not talked to me like they used to. Well babayyyyy, let me tell you now that God gave me a real reality check that day. He told me to stop expecting me out of others. And he also told me no one should cheer for me or celebrate me harder than myself. Y'all do know the scripture right? 1 Samuel 30:6b where David encouraged himself in the Lord his God. Sometimes you have to encourage yourself. So I ask you today what is it that you have graduated from? What's next? And are you encouraging yourself? if no one else shows up for you are you showing up for yourself? If no one else applauds you are you applauding yourself?
Maybe you didn't walk a stage but what have you graduated from spiritually? How did it make you feel? Did you encourage yourself? You have to know that God uniquely created you. And he purposely didn't make you like anyone else. I learned that day that those who were supposed to be there were there. Those who were to encourage' encouraged. If no one else shows up for you show up for yourself daily unapologetically. It is ok for you to be selfish in this season. it is ok to rest and love on yourself. You have supported and encouraged everyone else now pour that same thing into yourself. In what ways are you loving on yourself and encouraging yourself? How can you help someone else who may be struggling or who have struggled with this? Child, this little light of mine, I'm going to let it shine. I will be who he called me to me. So I'll start by encouraging myself and as I encourage myself I ask that you will take this same encouragement for yourself. I am resilient. I can overcome anything. I am proud of myself and far I have come. My hard work has and will pay off. I gave it my best and I will continue to give it my best. I see myself achieving my goals. I am living every moment, laughing every day, and loving beyond words.
Think of a time where you had to encourage yourself and share it below. Also offer a word of encourage for someone who may need it today. Always remember to BeYOUtiful!
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This blog is a powerful and transparent reflection of what it feels like to achieve something significant, yet still feel unfulfilled. It addresses the emotional weight of showing up for others and then realizing not everyone will show up for you. This is a way to create space for others to process their own silent disappointments and spiritual growth.
The use of 1 Samuel 30:6b—where David encouraged himself in the Lord—is a strong reminder that personal encouragement is sometimes the most important kind. The message to stop expecting ourselves from others is both challenging and freeing.
I really appreciate your transparency!!! I remember us having a conversation about your kindness and not being forth coming to tell people how you truly feel. Your honestly about your feeling is your super power. Writing is another super power you have. Let the power you have propel you forward. The only time you need to look back is when you recall to your mind that you have hope. When you remember how merciful the Lord has been to you. You are strong and He is filling you more and more.
Great blog and even though I think these comments have almost nothing to do with what you said, I love you!!!
NaTasha
Sis, this right here… I felt every word deep in my soul. I’ve cried behind it. I’ve grown from it.
"Abide in me, and I in you..." (John 15:4) That’s the scripture the Lord used to ground me when I was spiraling into disappointment and depletion. I had to come to terms with the truth: everything I do, achieve, and accomplish must be rooted in my Heavenly Father. Not in applause. Not in affirmation. Not even in reciprocation.
I had to fix my eyes on Him. And for me, one of the biggest distractions was performance. I spent so much time showing up strong, well-prepared, excellent—hoping that maybe, just maybe, the ones I had poured into would show up for me in return. And when they didn’t? The sting of that silence cut like light daggers to the heart. Especially when I’d see those same people go all out for others. It made me question my worth, my value, and honestly…my sanity.
This world celebrates it's own, and the more that I became kingdom, the less the world celebrated or acknowledged me. The people will scroll right past the things that are pure, purposeful, and praiseworthy. That alone will wound you if your soul isn't anchored.
When my husband threw me a beautiful 40th birthday party, baby using our entire tax refund, I thought it would be the moment I finally felt seen and celebrated. But even in that moment, I realized… it wasn’t really for me. It became another investment in others that left me empty. I didn’t host another party until seven years later, an intimate tea party that I only held because God whispered, “Now is the time.” And though I was still triggered by the lack of enthusiasm from others, the glory that fell in that tearoom reminded me: This isn’t about them. It’s about Him. There was Godly purpose in it.
From 40 to 47, God took me on a journey. I unlearned the need for external validation. I learned to honor my own growth and transformation.I stopped throwing parties for others with my time, my coins, my heart, only to be left disappointed when they didn’t show. Now? I take the trip. I book the spa day. I take myself to the fancy places and savor every bite of my favorite scoop of ice cream. I sabbath in God’s presence. I binge my favorite shows without guilt.
I’ve learned that in order for me to pour into the UNDESERVING UNGRATEFUL UNRECIPROCATING I have to be able to pour from my OVERFLOW. I had to learn to mute the distraction of disappointment by filling my own self first. I've also learned to value the people who see me, value me, and show up, and take my eyes off of the ones who don’t. Do I still see them, does it still hurt, YES, But like a mosquito bite instead of a tick bite.
God has taught me how to celebrate me. And in that sacred place of abiding, I’ve found peace. Restoration. And real joy.
Thank you for reminding me I’m not alone in this journey. 💛
I’m graduating from procrastination. I’m graduating from hoarding. I’m graduating from laziness & obesity. It’s a process but I’m loving this start. I have graduated from not being able to see I’m better than I was yesterday! I love us!
This blog is about being honest with how I really felt after reaching a major milestone—unaccomplished, disappointed, and questioning what was next. Even though I put in the work, I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing, especially when the people I thought would show up didn’t. It hurt. I cried. I felt unseen. But through that, I realized I had been looking for others to validate something I needed to give myself—encouragement. I had to face the hard truth: I can’t expect me from other people. And now, I’m learning to show up for myself, applaud myself, and ask, “What have I graduated from—and am I proud of me?